Good Morning Readers: I bring you not only one but two news stories from the great state of Florida this morning. From Ocala, Florida we have a mother who was arrested for threatening her children with a butcher knife because they would not say they loved her. She also threw a glass table at them. Do you blame your children for not saying they love you idiot? Butcher Momma is now being held without bond. She needs to find a new home with lots of love from the people in little white coats.
Our second story comes from St. Petersburg, Florida, where a 200 pound wild hog attacked a woman in her back yard yesterday. A neighbor told her there was a pig in her yard, so our 26 year old wonder went out to investigate, unfortunately the porker charged and cut her leg. She was treated at her home and is recovering nicely. The hog was removed by Pinellas County Animal Control and will be tested for rabies. If rabies are not found the hog will be sold to local Bar-B-Q restaurants for pulled pork sandwiches.
Thats the news Mr. and Mrs. America