FAR AND FEW BETWEEN

Good Morning Speakies:

Working stiffs like us look forward to paid holidays. After the Christmas and New Year’s holidays, the days off are far and few between. We have Martin Luther King Day and for some President’s Day but for most of us the next holiday off is Memorial Day. Think about it that’s not until May, so if you want a day off, call in sick, use a personal or vacation day to ease your pain. Tensions could flare between workers and I’ve located things you would really like to say at work if you could.

I don’t know what your problem is, but I’ll bet it’s hard to pronounce.
How about never? Is never good for you?
I’ll try to be nicer if you’ll try to be smarter.
I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.
I’m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
Do I look like a people person?
Sarcasm is just one service I offer.
If I throw a stick, will you leave?
I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?
How do I set a laser printer on stun?
Don't bother me. I'm living happily ever after.
You! Off my planet.
Does your train of thought have a caboose?
And now my favorite – Chaos, panic and disorder…my job here is done.

And to really put the icing on the cake, today we celebrate “Blame Somebody Else Day.” Have a nice day and be careful out there.